@MichaelTrying: The worst part of being named Michael is repeatedly being broken up with via a text that states *drops Mike*
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@hurlarious: I like to leave my gas cap hanging off when I'm on a date so when people start honking and waving I can wave back like I'm famous
@UNTRESOR: If there really was a Purge, and all crime was legal for one night, I'd probably do something super crazy, like loiter.
@ProudFFAalumni: woke up just in time to push my cat off the bed before he threw up. today is going to be magical.