@mjkspeaks: The worst thing about life is getting comfortable and then realizing that you don't have the remote.
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@Birdhumms: I got run over by a bus once but yes yes you're right, there's nothing worse than a paper cut!
@FrizerkaSandra: There is nothing in the world that lowers your IQ faster than trying to use someone else's coffee machine.
@juliussharpe: I like to pretend I'm on "American Idol" by holding a piece of paper with a number on it and running out of a room like an idiot.
@Karissajem: Neighbors just got a pirate ship playhouse for their backyard. Drunk me has never been so excited.