@WiseguyPictures: The worst time to find out your parents are dead is probably right after you've taken a large hit from helium balloon.
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@thepunningman: Dr: your father is real sick Woman: [sobbing] how long? [her dad wheelies past on a bmx] Dr: almost six yards that time
@max_pad21: My wife just gave me that come hither look and when I come hithered she pointed to the trash
@Douchekevin: Bad is accidently sending your buddy a dirty sext intended for your girlfriend. Worse is getting 'lemme think about it' for a reply.