@Reverend_Scott: The year 4542, artifacts are discovered from our once flourishing civilization. "Looks like they worshiped apples." said one archeologist.
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@TheThomason: Professor X gets a lot of credit as a progressive considering his solution to a race conflict was "give them their own school."
@greg_vee: If by self-help you mean helping myself to all the liquor in your cabinet... Then yeah... I'm about as self-helpful as they come.
@AsiaDMO: The worst thing about insomnia is discovering all the new hours of the day that you're hungry.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: [Brings a snowball to a work meeting and tosses it at boss] I'm not trying to disprove the theory of global warming I just don't like you.