@noog: The year is 2020. Hip hop has fully merged with dubstep, creating the genre of music known as Dubhop. All hope for mankind is lost
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@djdavemichaels: Do bouncers get paid in toothpicks or are they a part of their uniform, or what exactly is the deal here?
@1Bad_Scientist: Her: Why do you have a copy of 50 Shades of Grey in your bathroom? Perv! Me: Oh. No that's just for when I run out of toilet paper.
@LaziestCanine: [on intercom] Pilot: does anyone know how to land an airplane? asking for a friend, i swear