@Parker_Simpson: The year is 2065. Every adjective once used to describe another person is now deemed offensive. Noone's left their homes in years.
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@_Water_Baby: I would rather see my husband with another woman in his arms than a hammer in his hand.
@hammbone84: MY ROOMBA IS SOMEHOW LOOSE OUTDOORS AND I'M TERRIFIED OF THE CONSEQUENCES FOR THE ECOSYSTEM AS IT HAS NO NATURAL PREDATORS.
@hipstermermaid: 1886: We invented a car! 1903: We invented a plane! 1969: We went to the moon! ... ... ... ... ... ... 2015: Taco Emoji!
@PaperWash: [stranded on Mars] me: [journal day 1] I have enough rations for 300 maybe 400 days me: [journal day 2] I am out of rations