@Buffalojilll: There are two kinds of dog owners. Those that have tried their dog's treats and those that are lying.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Axenbane: I would be completely shocked if I ever won the lottery. Mainly because I don't play the lottery.
@slimmy_shady: Homeless man asked me if I could 'spare some change'. I told him 'change comes from within'. Long story short, I'm missing a kidney.
@TheHyyyype: HER: my friend katie is single again ME: so's my buddy dave, we should set them up HER: yes! [later] DAVE AND KATIE [talking to the cops]: we swear we were framed!