@prncss_fifi: "There can only be one!" -Arab eyebrows
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@david8hughes: [in the ambulance] Paramedic: what's your blood type? Me: whatever. I'm not fussy
@Brampersandon_: Did you really get a crocodile tattooed around your belly button? -IT'S AN ALLIGATOR KAREN. GOD YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT.
@BillPelicanBros: *job interview* Boss: Give an example of when you've done something creative Me: When I listed my 'experience' on the application form