@lawyerthoughts: "There is no such thing as a stupid question." - person who has never walked my family through attaching a photo to an email.
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@samfromks: Her: What veggies are the kids having with dinner? Me: (Smacking the bottom of a ketchup bottle) Fresh Tomatoes...
@ToxicProbably: Jeez make one joke about putting cyanide in someone's food and suddenly they don't want you to cook for them anymore
@kcmoore51: 16: My friend is coming to get something while we're gone. Me: Should we leave a key? 16: No, she'll just go thru the doggie door again.
@Joshuawbenson: PEOPLE WITH CHRONICALLY MOIST HANDS: When you have dry lips, rub them on your palms. I call it Lip palm. It's free.