@JohnHilsen: There will be no screen names left for our children's children.
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@KyleMcDowell86: [job interview] "What's your biggest weakness?" "My honesty" "I don't think-" "I broke into ur house and made love to ur cat last night"
@ceejoyner: 2 halloweens ago I was brutally owned by a small child when I answered my door in normal clothes and she said "nice lumberjack costume."
@KentWGraham: Who decided that the abbreviation for pound should be two letters it doesn’t contain?