@JohnHilsen: There will be no screen names left for our children's children.
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@MomOfTeen: Walking by the lingerie section Youngest: Why do they make the underwear so fancy? No one is ever going to see it anyway. Me: Uh huh.
@BatBatshitcrazy: In the summer there's only so many clothes you can take off. On that note, please send bail money.
@koalaslament: I need a new job. One where I'm always running out the door with my arms flailing and holding a jar screaming "I GOTTA GET THIS TO THE LAB!"