@KentWGraham: There’s a fire at a trick birthday candle plant. Firefighters have been battling the blaze on and off for 5 days.
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@foodfacenow: Interviewer: What drives you? Me: The bus mostly Interviewer: I mean what motivates you to get out of bed in the morning? M: missing the bus
@WoodyLuvsCoffee: I wish cats came with a counter that told you what life they were on. Number 8 kitty? Maybe you need to work on that attitude.
@batkaren: "Every dog has his day," they used to say. Still, no one was quite prepared that morning Emperor Mister Pickles marched his army into town.
@WhatsHerFace33: If your wife says "what would you do without me?" "Live happily ever after" is NOT the correct answer. Brrrr it's cold in this doghouse :(