@tastefactory: There's a spider that's been in the same place on my living room wall for an hour so he's essentially also watching Shrek.
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@edfoxcomedy: "Doctor: Put the IV in. Nurse: The 4 what?" - chronic problem in Roman emergency rooms
@TheGrimKing: Before meeting a hot chick, wish I could talk to the dude who's sick of her bullshit.
@seamussaid: I suppose you can take my cold dead hand when you pry it from my warm live one and charge me w/unlawful possession of human remains