@fart: theres a train nerd counting the number of ppl that get on and off at every stop. at first i pitied him but he seems happy so now i hate him
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@trentistweeting: [turning off Shrek 2] well, i'd say that movie was shrekcellent! "trent, 1 more shrek pun and i'm divorcing you." oh karen, don't ogre-react
@ArfMeasures: "We can't put it off any longer Alan, our daughter needs new shoes" CENTIPEDE DAD: [staring out the window] This is gonna bankrupt us Susan
@StoferComic: An argument with my wife is like the gas pedal on a Prius. I can put my foot down, but I don't really expect much to happen...