@shkeeber: There's no easy way to tell someone you lost their kid in a high stakes game of duck duck goose.
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@tchrquotes: Having kids is a little like when the free sample lady tries to tell you all about the cheese & you pretend to be interested while you eat.
@MarfSalvador: Wife: Will he still able to play the accordion? Doc: Ma'am, your husband has no brain function whatsoever Wife: So yes then
@murrman5: [family hears me pull in driveway] wife: please don't wrestling announcer: sorry ma'am he already paid me. NOW ENTERING THE HOUSE FROM WORK