@UNTRESOR: There's no "u" in narcissist
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@ppppolls: 30% of Republican primary voters nationally say they support bombing Agrabah. Agrabah is the country from Aladdin. #NotTheOnion
@Cpin42: My son challenged my wife & I to a game of hide-and-seek. We took off for the weekend and left him some food. In your face, loser!
@onion_an: Me: What music you into? Date: I love hip hop Me: Yeah me too [thinking of something to say to impress her] Me: Soup Dogg is my cousin
@10InchesPlus: You call it armed robbery, I call it people giving me gifts to celebrate my new gun!