@BMcCarthy32: There's no way I'm the only person who thinks Kristen Stewart is doing the world's best Garfield impression.
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@TitansHomer: My wife started clipping coupons to help me save money. She keeps them in the side pocket of her $800 purse.
@fro_vo: "hey what's that sqiggly thing on the ground?" "i don't know, it looks kinda like a w or m" -- how the worm got its name
@GreenishDuck: Next time you're having a bad day just remember that alligators spend their whole lives looking like they're trying to do a push-up.