@Im_Tricia: There's no way that Cinderella was treated like shit her entire life, then a prince tells her he loves her & she wasn't like "yeah right."
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@TheBoydP: If you get nervous when the IT support desk takes control of your computer remember they're whispering "no weirdos please" to themselves.
@blakeshelton: I'm so drunk right now I just walked into Canadian customs and shouted "Why y'all checkin' me?! Ur the ones with a pot leaf on your flag!!"
@IamEnidColeslaw: my signature move is called "the Mouse," where I run around the dance floor wearing nothing but a tampon
@Brampersandon_: How did the date go? -Not good. Aww what went wrong? -*thinks back to accidentally popping a zit into her soup* She just wasn't my type.