@robfee: There's not a day that goes by where I don't think about that Backstreet Boy asking his pals, "am I sexual?" & they're like, "yeah."
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@whytruy: Obama: joe can you please explain all the cheetos that are in the kitchen Biden: I didn't want Trump to feel- Obama: Joe, Biden: ...lonely
@Fred_Delicious: I bet Lincoln is looking down like "dude, trust me, that is not a bad night in a theater"
@jakob_huber: "I hate hashtags!" Dad screams as he smashes his #1 Dad coffee mug against a wall.