@OfficialMizGin: There’s nothing more disappointing for a woman than finding out a bearded guy in a flannel shirt is a hipster and not a lumberjack.
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@realbjdunne: [Mexican Restaurant] Waiter: a little salsa for your chips, folks? Patron: I dunno... *looks at chips* you guys want him to dance for you?
@RuthePhoenix: Had a really nice moment this morning with the postman as we held hands through the letterbox. Only slightly ruined by his screaming.