@Leemanish: There's this guy at work who's always putting on a sweatshirt. No one's ever seen his face.
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@clyderun: My company just gave the janitor the Employee of the Month Award in a big ceremony that he spent hours cleaning up afterwards.
@meganamram: If you count a little kid on another kid's shoulders under a trench coat as two people, then I have had TWO boyfriends
@MeganBaca1: Sitting behind a couple in this theater that's making out. I'm gonna lean forward and whisper "This is nice" in a minute.
@pleatedjeans: [high school reunion] Amanda: wow, you haven't changed a bit me: [covered in acne and wearing faded Pokemon shirt]: yeah I know