@ComedicBust: "These diet pills better work," I say to myself as I wash them down with a chocolate milkshake.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Juicedballs: Walk into a pawn shop with a ponytail & a handlebar mustache & they treat you like Ray Liotta walking thru that restaurant in Goodfellas
@WilliamAder: Can't wait for Daylight Saving Time to end this weekend so the clock in my car will have the correct time.
@DaddyJew: Honey, I think the milks gone bad "what makes you say that dear?" *milk presses the gun to my back* just a hunch, btw where's your purse?