@timdonakowski: "These fries are too crispy" - inventor of the microwave
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@Marlebean: I just plugged the charger into my phone, in the correct hole, on the first try. So it IS possible, guys. IT. IS. POSSIBLE.
@notacroc: [spelling bee] JUDGE: your word is antonym ME: synonym JUDGE: no you have to spell it, not give an example ME: *lips on mic* i-t
@rachelle_mandik: BOSS: It's come to my attention that you've disabled attachments for emails. You have to fix that. BUDDHA: But attachments cause suffering.
@TheMichaelRock: Of course every kiss begins with k. That's how the English language works, stupid.