@BrainFumbles: They said she was a cat lady but when I threw her off a small building she didn't land on her feet and now I'm in jail for murder.
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@weinerdog4life: I scream, you scream, my puppet screams, my other puppet screams, the waiter screams, this is the worst first date ever
@RandomAntics: I'm told as a lady in my 30s I shouldn't wear certain things anymore - like halter tops, pigtails, and the scalps of my vanquished enemies.
@mstluvstrinkets: Is it against the law for postal workers to smile or was it my audacity to mail something?