@SonOfCha: They say if you ever get attacked by a shark you should punch it in the nose which is easy cause imagine how composed you would be.
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@PinkCamoTO: H: You look nice. Me: I'm meeting one of my Twitter friends today. H: So you want your picture on the evening news to be a nice one? Me: Yep
@thejessbess: I always wear running shoes while driving because you won't know what the terrain will be like until after the cop pulls you over.
@toastymoe: Bad news: I got so busy drafting tweets, I forgot to pick the kids up at school. Worse news: I'm a bus driver
@JesKeepSwimming: I'm sorry if I looked interested. You probably caught me fantasizing about bacon.