@lurve_meh: They say kill 'em with kindness but it's much quicker if you just take their phone charger away.
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@RobElliottComic: [having sex] Me: CHECK IT OUT NO HANDS! Her: USE YOUR HANDS! Me: *raises the roof*
@remington3000: I'm going to open a restaurant and call it I Don't Care. So us men can finally take u women to the place u want to go to when we ask
@YUCKYBOT: You know what they say? Once you go white, you'll rob the world of it's resources and murder indigenous peoples.