@blondebombs: They say milk is good for your teeth..you know what else is good for your teeth..minding your own damn buisness
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@TheCiscoKidder: After clipping my toddler's fingernails for over 2 years, I think I could diffuse a bomb while riding a roller coaster.
@Sassafrantz: Out of all the children's stories, Goldilocks is the most ridiculous. How's someone just gonna fall asleep while committing a felony? smh
@NoTheOtherJohn: Me: *Rubbing Chin* Why am I always hungry 30 mins after I eat Chinese food? Chin: [pushing my hand away}I dunno man I just deliver the food.
@Tmoney68: Man, my 84-year-old neighbor must REALLY like working on his car. He's been under there changing the oil for 3 days.