@1Happytwit: They say you are what you eat but what happens if you didn't mean to eat it. I don't want to be a bug.
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@hrtbps: Interviewer: So when did you decide you wanted to be a sumo wrestler? Me: When someone tried to get me onto the dancefloor at a wedding.
@Cryptoterra: it says here you got fired from Olive Garden because you kept saying "pasta la vista, baby" to people. why would you put that on a resume