@owlbacon: They should make realistic pregnancy test commercials. 2 best friends in a bathroom praying for a neg & celebrating w a shot & a happy dance
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@AristotlesNZ: If I was Penguin's attorney I'd request bail by saying "He's no flight risk!" Then Hi-5 the whole courtroom but Batman. I'd leave him hangin
@ChipKellysBalls: To celebrate Boxing Day on Friday, I had a five minute training montage and beat the shit out of the biggest Russian I could find ...
@msdanifernandez: Did you guys hear about the football player who hits women? No the other one. No the other one.