@Lisa_Laughs_: They're not all brilliant, but they're all mine. Meaning my tweets, and maybe my kids, whatever.
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@AutumnSkye13: Baked beans are like regular beans except they can't stop laughing, love munchies and sleep on your couch.
@Holy_Mowgli: ME: I got fired for microwaving fish at work HER: whoa, fired? that seems harsh ME: whatever, I didn't like working at the aquarium anyway
@mrnickharvey: Son: What are caterpillars afraid of? Me: It's unlikely that they experience fear. They're not self-aware, so... Son: [sadly] Dogerpillars.