@Elizasoul80: They're not gym clothes if you don't go to the gym, they're pajamas.
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@notalogin: Guy: What do you do? Me: I tell jokes on Twitter G:No, I mean, what do you do to support yourself? Me: I tell myself that they're good jokes
@okmatchhead: If the voices in my head had a British accent, I would do what they say more often.
@shutupmikeginn: 'Pampers' is a good product name because it implies being able to poop in your disposable underwear is a great luxury