@MableGertrude: Things were different in the 80s one time I was kidnapped for a week and no one looked for me. I came home & my room was converted to a gym.
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@FatherWithTwins: 4yo: What do you love most in the world? Me: You & your brother 4yo: Oh Me: What about you? 4yo: The fire tree in Plants vs. Zombies Me: Oh
@deadstick_ron: Therapist: and how are you now? Morgan Freeman: I am fine Morgan Freeman: but Morgan Freeman was not fine Therapist: I'm sorry what?