@pattioshankable: Think having your kid hear you having sex is the worst? NOPE! Having your kid run into the room with a light saber to save you...MUCH WORSE!
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@TheBoydP: "Why put a baseball bat up when you can just lay it down on a stair in the middle of the stairway? What could go wrong?" ~My son apparently
@C00LpenNAME: Just remember, when the jury is deciding between premeditated murder and manslaughter... it's the thought that counts
@tehaveragejoel: make your life more efficient by cutting out the middle man. quit your job. kill your friends. throw your food directly into the toilet.
@SuadShamma: "The sum of the cabbage is directly proportional to the square root of the carrot divided by the mayo. That is Cole's Law."