@SchooIAnswer: THIS 😂
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@DanMentos: LIFE HACK: Answer your phone "Hello you're on the air" and 99% of the time people will just hang up
@TheToddWilliams: WAITER: Would you like some more bread? SWORD SWALLOWER: No, but could you get me another butter knife please.
@joejwest: DOROTHY: What do these shoes do? GLINDA: Send you home D: Lame [tries new pair] And these? G: Wait- D: [clicks heels] [turns into hamburger]
@AndrewNadeau0: All these pregnancy photos are so annoying. It's like, "Ugh, we get it, you ate a baby."