@8rustystaples: This bicyclist in front of me sure dresses like he could be pedaling faster.
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@DamienFahey: 13 Types of Regret You'll Experience After Clicking on a Link to an Article That Won't Live Up to its Exaggerated Headline
@AnOrangeSNES: I ate the worst cake of my life today, but then again that must have been why it was free at the urinal.
@TitansHomer: My ex girlfriend has a tattoo of a shell on her inner thigh. If you put your ear to it you can smell the ocean.