@mattgallo123: This cashier just held my five dollar bill up to the light in case you're wondering how I do with first impressions.
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@Ideal_Victoria: Me: I don’t care how cute you are, I will tear you to shreds if you don’t start cooperating. Wrapping paper: *rips*
@Mikecanrant: A guy with a locked account just asked me why I never retweet him. Stay in school kids.
@5oulhealer: My 7yo gave up a simple joke thats good enough 2 laugh at. Why did the chewing gum cross the road? Cause it was stuck on the chicken's foot!