@abhorrent_wife: This could be us but you eatin'
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@xlpaws: I hate it when people show up at MY house, knock on MY door, and then ask me why I'm not wearing pants.
@VinoTica: For once, I'd like to take a medication w/side effects such as come-hither eyes, mad juggling skills, & Julia Childs' prowess in the kitchen
@Shingaboop: Coworker: GOOD MORNING! Me: Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee Coworker: But you don't drink coffee Me: Exactly