@LoveNLunchmeat: This diet is probably gonna end in murder, but still pretty excited. I'm gonna look so skinny in my mugshot!
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@batkaren: Accidentally ran the wash with Ecstasy still in a back pocket. Now my jeans are freaking out, and the zipper won't stop grinding its teeth.
@ThaJawn: (Animal school) Lion: That's my desk Wildebeast: Sorry, I'm gnu -5 minutes later Sloth: *slowly falling from chair* Ha. Ha. Ha. Gnu!