@lecalabara: This dude forgot to put tomatoes on my sandwich. Thanks, "artist". Now I have nothing to pick off.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Wine_Honey1: Note to self: Don't get so drunk and try to ride the zoo animals, no matter how friendly they are.
@KeetPotato: [answers my phone] "hello?" hey it's me, can you talk? "since i was two" no, can you talk now? "do you hear words coming out my mouth?"
@TheCareBare: she's all "don't sleep in the nude- what if there's a fire and the fire men come and see you naked" uh you pretty much described my fantasy