@ktmcburr: This entire pizza told me thigh gaps are for queers.
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@Awk0Tacoo: I can't get mad when I hear babies screaming in public because honestly, I feel the same way sometimes.
@MrsRupertPupkin: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, you can cry when the girl you used to babysit gets engaged before you do.
@Canadian_Cutie_: Dad: ok we need to find the number to that store, get the phone book Me: Get the what now?
@cat_beltane: "so what did you do before self-driving cars?" "we just drove 'em ourselves!" "wow, no one died that way?" "oh no, millions of people died"