@RickAaron: This grocery store is playing "Freebird" which I interpret as an invitation to shoplift a turkey.
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@FaisalAdam_: In a parallel universe, cartoons are watching us and thinking "how sad, they die if you drop an anvil on their heads..."
@JermHimselfish: Whipped cream is just shaving cream that does whatever it's girlfriend tells it to do.
@Tommytoughstuff: "How does Dracula get his hair so perfect without a mirror? Oh questions about the job? No I'm good."