@Swishergirl24: This guy on GMA is thanking God b/c he survived 2 plane crashes. I'm pretty sure "God" is trying to kill him.
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@AndyAsAdjective: Respond to every "How was your weekend?" today by staring off into the distance & whispering "So much blood..."
@EJGomez: judas: yo jesus: sup judas [hiding crocs behind back]: would u like if someone bought you crocs jesus: id rather be betrayed lmao judas: wow
@Marlebean: *interrupts your heartfelt story* Oh NOW I hear your New York accent!! Say "dying wish" again! Ok now say "coffee"!