@AdamUrbane: This hammock is the most relaxing thing I've ever had slingshot me point blank into the ground.
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@fart: "my favorite bon jovi song? oh its definitely the one where it sounds like a computer is trying to talk while burping"
@DanMentos: "If you're having girl? Problems. I feel bad. For you? Son." -Russian guy telling his pregnant wife he hopes it's a boy.