@OkieGirl405: This is a fake tweet, someone asked me to put their # in my phone so I'm pretending to add it to my contacts
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@Glove_Monkey: Someone once told me "If you love something, set it free". I told them not to mind about those noises coming from the basement.
@thejessbess: People are like, "Jess, can you give me some advice?" & I'm like, "K, don't get kidnapped."
@rockymomax: [wakes up next to perfectly crocheted sweater with knitting needles in hands] Oh dear god not again