@viciousbabydoll: This is an example of the shit I text my kid. I know, I know. Mom of the Year material right here.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Me: *gets all four daughters dressed* Wife: I want everyone in Christmas dresses. Me: But- Wife: Everyone. Me: Fine. *puts on my dress*
@LionJenkins: Friendly advice: Don't compare your girlfriend to an avocado. Even if she IS the good kind of fat.
@ChicorelliStar: Just found out my daughter's super power is repeating what I've said about others as soon as she meets them.