@DrinkingDad: "This is bullshit" - bull farmer giving barn tours
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@Scorpio1080: Black Friday: Because Only in America, People trample others for Sales the day after being thankful for what they already have
@AimeeHelene1: My diet plan consists of multiple naps. Because you can't stuff your face when you're sleeping.
@aecide: Omg someone broke into my professor's house & stole his laptop so my class today has been cancelled. I gotta find this person & thank him.
@GoldenSpirals: A truck just flipped a dead squirrel onto my windshield and it's stuck in my wiper. I guess I don't have to stop to get supper tonight.