@CatchThemAlI: this is me
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@AimeeHelene1: CW: What's for lunch; smells good! Me: Well I made lasagna last night but lost a fingernail in it & haven't found it yet. CW: Me: *smirks*
@BeardSpice: [God creating spiders] What if I made a tiny land octopus that could walk on walls?
@CountMackula: Im not trying to brag or anything, but I just got invited to play Candy Crush on FB
@rmfnord: If I was a ghost, I'd write "Happy Birthday" in blood on your wall for your birthday, cuz you may be cursed, but it's still your birthday.