@AGreaterMonster: This is serious as a heart attack but not one of those funny heart attacks. Those make me laugh.
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@tastefactory: *cop sees chalk outline on family's driveway* "Damn, a cute bunny was murdered" "No, the kids who live here drew that, the body's over here"
@ElizaBayne: "Move miss, please get out of the way. Please get out of the way, miss. Please get out of the way."- Ludacris's cousin, Kurteous
@BellesJar: Everybody thinks Australians are laid back until one of us is standing over you with a chainsaw asking you to pronounce Aluminium correctly.
@UniqueDude2: me: hello darkness my old friend darkness: you are going to hate me but I forgot your name