@hell_homer: This is your brain: [hippo standing in a field] This is your brain on twitter: [100s of people surround the hippo patting it rhythmically]
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@Marlebean: Don't make a mountain out of a molehill Do it with mashed potatoes, then play keyboard for the aliens ... I think my cough medicine expired
@Reverend_Scott: I'm tired of the bad jokes, dad. Doubt you can hear me anyway. I'm pullin' the plug. "...hi pullin' the plug, I'm da-" *pulls the plug*
@Cpin42: A lot of parents are asking questions about my baby cannon. Like "Does it really fire babies?" & "Have you seen my son Jeff?"