@TheAlexNevil: This lasagna recipe has been handed down in my family for generations in the hopes that someone would eventually make it.
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@EverydayGirlDad: 4yo: You're a good dad. Me: Thanks. 4yo: You'd be better if you said yes more. Me: Okay. 4yo: Can I have ice cream? Think about what I said.
@hippieswordfish: [police chase] FRIEND: ditch the stolen stuff ME: are u sure F: just do it M: *throws out stolen anchor and car comes to a screeching halt*
@daemonic3: As an ultimate act of selflessness, someday I will travel to a 3rd world country and adopt a small, less fortunate highway.
@Jade_VK: [alarm clock goes off] ok it's happening again it's a day and it's here again *googling* day again why how to unsubscribe days