@Crunk_Jews: This midlife crisis has a lot less bank heists and high speed car chases than I had imagined.
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@batkaren: Accidentally ran the wash with Ecstasy still in a back pocket. Now my jeans are freaking out, and the zipper won't stop grinding its teeth.
@TheBoydP: I heard that no real accountants were consulted during the filming of the new movie The Accountant. They want the movie to be entertaining.
@DaHess1: You say drug dealer. I say astute, urban entrepreneur embracing the booming chemical escapism market.